Late Night Thoughts

So it shouldn't have hit me like it did, all at once. An overwhelming, joyful sensation. I was getting ready to fall into bed for the night and finally try to catch up on sleep that I missed from Thursday night/Friday morning when I finally realized: This week I'm going to be bringing my son home. Well, if everything goes according to plan that is. It's so hard to believe that this little thing that has been punching and kicking me incessantly for 9 months is finally going to make his appearance in this world. Everything we've made, everything we've been through, everything that will forever be our world is about to come out and show us what true love really is, what life really is, what being alive is all about. It's crazy to think we've created this, this little man who's going to grow up and change our world.

Dear Little Maxwell,

It's your week to come. I remember everything - the first day I realized I was pregnant with you. The fright I felt, the anxiety, which was soon quickly replaced by an overpowering feeling of love, happiness, hope, and promise. We've been through a tough road, but I promise to make it as paved as possible for you. You're finally about to meet the people who have been screaming outside your shell. Well, at times one of them meowed. It might be a little scary at first because it's dark and warm in there, and you'll be immersed in bright lights, loud noises, and cold. But not for long, if your daddy and I have any say in it :) I can't wait to teach you so many things, to show you everything that you never knew was possible, to watch you grow and run out of fingers counting the number of times you make me proud. Just remember, I may be "mean" at times, I may not be your favorite person at times, but most of all I'm just trying to get by with figuring out how to teach you, how to love you, how to make the most out of your life. You're our little surprise blessing. Never think of yourself any other way, because there's no other way that is the truth. You're very much loved and very much wanted. I can't wait to meet you doll.

Love always,
Mommy