Crazy nights and perfect days

So a couple days ago, Max decided that he was going to stop moving and freak me out. He didn't move for about 5 hours. Needless to say, I was bawling and crying on the way to the hospital with the worst in mind. Not what I needed. Apparently, stressing out can make you tense up and hold everything together, not giving him a chance to move. We got in there, I heard his heartbeat, and instantly relaxed and within 10 minutes he was moving again. WHAT RELIEF! I semi-figured out the crib today. I got everything put in place, but it's still loose so I'm going to try and see later what comes about with that. Talk about crazy. Anyway, finally ordered the bedding set!!! The main color is green :) I decided not to go with my initial bedding, because the one I found was adorable and I got SO much with it :) So now all that is left to get in - besides waiting for that to mail in, is the mattress! HEE! RELIEF RELIEF RELIEF. Yesterday I was so excited! We had probably one of the best days in a while having a ton of friends come over and grilled out for the game. But Natalie Harp comes in, holding a Bumbo chair and I got SO giddy! I already have it sitting out waiting for him to be able to hold up his head. Well, we got back to the doctor Wednesday to figure everything out... here's what the crib bedding looks like:Dear Baby Maxwell,
Please don't give me a heart attack like you did the other day. I don't know if I can handle this much longer. I've never experienced such stress like this before... you're not even here yet and you're already knowing how to keep me on my toes! It's okay, years from now I'll make sure to repay you :) The contractions are getting stronger and more frequent, so I know not too long until you're keeping me up at all ungodly hours. I imagine myself being like someone going through a withdrawal, although from sleep. I hope your daddy understands. Well, he might be experiencing the same thing too. You're on his mind all the time. I've started getting more and more nervous now, wondering if I'm going to be able to live up to my mom's precedent and giving you everything. Your wonderful daddy just hugs me and makes sure to reassure me. And then he sparks my imagination with how wonderful and gorgeous you're going to be. I can only imagine right now. He's still convinced you're going to say, "Goo goo gaa gaa." I'll be waiting to hear that one. In a few days, you'll be considered full term then I'll be walking on eggshells waiting anxiously for you. I'm only getting more and more anxious with each passing day. You're right beneath my heart for now, but once you get here, you're gonna fill it up with so much joy and happiness. I may be still a bit uneasy about how everything's going to play out, but once it gets here, I'm sure this will all be a memory. We're waiting for you little one, I hope you're ready. You have no clue how blessed you're about to be.

Love always,
Mommy

Doctor visit

So today was the last 2 week appointment this morning. Now we're at appointments once a week. Docs are saying we're making good progress, but no baby this week haha :) And okay, I think we have the best docs ever. I haven't seen Dr. Hinton for over like 10-12 weeks. She comes in, "So how's Max doing?" I was floored that she remembered his name, let alone who we were! She's amazing, they're all pretty amazing and incredible. Good news! My pain has eased up for the most part. Crossing my fingers it stays that way. I didn't realize how nervous I'd be getting about everything - just all that I want to do and plan for his life, to make it the very best. I know it'll be tough with everything going on: school and having a baby. It's going to be my biggest test yet, and hopefully end up being one of the greatest accomplishments of my life. I seriously don't know how I'd be able to do this without Bryan. He's been there for everything. He might not always know how to make things better, but just being here is enough. We still have yet to make any more progress on the baby room and figure out how to put the crib together. The instructions were quite difficult to follow and we blamed it on being tired, but looking at it the other night with David Estes here, we STILL couldn't figure it out. It's okay, duct tape works right? Anyway, still have to work at finding final preparations for the room, but I'll post a picture of the semi-finished crib.















Dear Maxwell,
Only 27 more days. We're talking about you all the time, your daddy and me. He's already so proud of you, as am I. I've begun marveling at how much you move instead of being in pain and I can't believe how much you've grown and how far we've come. Also, how big my belly's gotten! Although I was reassured that I'm still very tiny today. I can't wait to show you off to the world, to dress you in all the cute clothes I've had waiting for you for AGES it feels like. If your daddy had his way, it'd be all tshirts and jeans. No worries, I don't even have a pair of jeans for you yet. I feel like I'm constantly cleaning and rearranging things in your room to pass the time by. The days are just creeping by. It'll all be worth it once I hold you in my arms for the first time and see your little face. AND YOUR BRIGHT BLUE EYES! :) Bryan told me I had to let you close them eventually... but what he doesn't know, right? Agh, hurry here soon. We've got our arms open to show you everything you need to know in this world. Although you're gonna show us more than we'll ever be able to show you. We only think our lives have changed so much right now, I told Daddy last night just wait 'til he's here and how much greater our lives are going to be, how blessed we're going to be. All my life I've heard how you never really see life until you see it through the eyes of a child. I'm ready.

Love you and ready to kiss your whole face,
Mommy

"The moment a child is born,
the mother is also born.
She never existed before.
The woman existed, but the mother, never.
A mother is something absolutely new."
Rajneesh

Almost 4 weeks left!

So it's about 4 weeks until his big debut, and things are only getting more and more real. It's so crazy to think that just a year ago I was merely a sophomore going into college and had no idea what was about to hit me later in the year. It's been a crazy ride, but finally everything is coming into place. Last weekend was the big baby sale and we were able to get pretty much EVERYTHING! Talk about relief! Might not have been exactly what I wanted, but I'm grateful for what I did get. I'm so lucky that I have so many people that are excited, instead of the being judgmental and negative about the whole situation.


Dear Maxwell,
It's about 4 weeks 'til I get to see your screaming face in the hospital, but you should know that I'm dreaming about it every night. I can't wait to hold you, to take care of you, and make your life the best that I can. It's been a crazy year getting to where we are right now, but I promise you, I'm going to be there for you for every minute. It's been bittersweet, mainly emphasizing the sweet part though, little angel. You've managed to completely turn around my life and make me realize how much life isn't going to be about me anymore. You're in everything I do, everything I think, and there's no other way I'd have it right now. Of course I have what-if's, but God knows what he's doing. You were my special surprise and brought to me for a reason. I may get upset and cry alot, and I know you know it's going on, because you always make sure to poke me as if to say, "It's all right Mommy, I'm worth it all." And you must take after your father, because you're right, and you're pretty smart already. I dream of what you'll become, and I'll be there throughout the way making sure you do whatever you want to do. Your daddy's ready to see you too. I couldn't thank God any more for him. He's hoping that you're gonna be a huge sports fan like him and be able to be his mini-me :) We both are so grateful that despite everything, you're healthy. Can't ask for more than that right now! Anyway, we're going to spend this entire week getting everything ready for your debut. I love you little Maxwell.

Love always,
Mommy